Who’s There? A Series of Unfortunate Knock-Knocks, With Annotations.

Who’s There? A Series of Unfortunate Knock-Knocks, With Annotations.

Last week, a friend of mine mentioned that she was thinking about applying to library school. In a rash moment, I promised that if she did, I would teach her “the secret Dewey Decimal knock-knock jokes to which only initiates are privy.” 

Upon further questioning, I was forced to admit that there are no secret Dewey Decimal knock-knock jokes for librarians. But I thought I’d better make some up, just so as to be true to my word. Herewith, the never-before-seen jokes (and some would say they should’ve STAYED that way), with some related fiction and nonfiction book recommendations to help them go down easier:


Knock knock!
Who's there?
Wire.
Wire who?
Why're the comic books in 741.5 when they're not even NONFICTION? Huh?

Comic books are in 741.5, right next to the books about drawing, because the 740’s are the section for art books. That’s where you’ll find Little Lit: Folklore and Fairy Tale Funnies, edited by Art Spiegelman and Francoise Mouly, which provides a sampling of traditional tales retold in comic-book form by a jaw-dropping array of illustrators and graphic artists. Fun for kids, teens, and adults, who might recognize some of the artists from underground comic books or the covers of The New Yorker magazine.


Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Hood.
Hood who?
Hood'a thunk that books about pets would be in the 630's when books about animals in general are in the 590's? I mean, what's up with that?

Animals in general are part of Biology, which is Science, which is in the 500’s; but pets are domesticated animals, so they end up in Applied Science in the 600’s range, right between gardening and cookbooks. Simple, no? (Well, no.)

In any case, May I Pet Your Dog? by Stephanie Calmenson, illustrated by Jan Ormerod, brilliantly fills a previously unmet need: it’s a basic guide to dog behavior especially for kids who don’t have dogs themselves, and who may even be a little bit scared of them. My kid, who is quite wary of dogs despite their domesticated status, studied this book hard and has bravely used its tips when meeting dogs around the neighborhood and at friends’ houses.


Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Windy.
Windy who?
Windy number of novels started getting out of hand, most libraries moved them out of the 800's and into their very own special area. But you'll still sometimes find short story collections back there in 813.08, if the library's really retro.

Paul Jennings’s short-story collections—which have titles like Uncanny! Unreal! And Unmentionable!—aren’t horror, exactly, but some of the twists at the end are pretty…creepy. They’ll make you laugh and shudder at the same time. Perfect for tweens with a taste for the bizarre.


Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Decimal.
Decimal who?
Decimal books sometimes get stuck behind de big books, and then no one can find them!

Little kids love little books for their little hands, but boy are they a pain to shelve. Author whose books are most likely to get put on their own little library shelf so as to avoid this problem? Beatrix Potter, of Peter Rabbit fame. If you can’t find her books in the regular “P”s section, ask the librarian.


Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Dewey.
Dewey who?
Dewey really have to hear any more of these knock-knock jokes? 

No, we’re all done here! But if the taste for knock-knocks hasn’t been knocked out of you yet, try Knock, Knock! a brand-new compendium of fourteen jokes (guess what kind?) illustrated by children’s book artists like Judy Schachner, David Small, and Jon J. Muth. My favorite? Henry Cole’s groaningly silly “Easter Bunny” series, which starts out with “Esther. Esther who? Esther bunny.” and runs even further downhill from there.


Knock, Knock!
Nobody home; go read a book!

March 11, 2008

AddThis Social Bookmark Button
Comments

Els, These jokes and their segway into book ideas is clever and cute. I better go get reading!

Post a comment

If you have a TypeKey or TypePad account, please Sign In