Thanksgiving & Favorites

Hope everyone had an extraordinary Thanksgiving. Ours was lots of fun. Five little girls under five years joined 11 grown-ups in my parents living room. I especially enjoyed spending time holding the eight-week-old baby. H had a great time -- she talked a lot about turkey with stuffing and cranberry sauce and how Nana was cooking Thanksgiving dinner, but she was too excited and distracted to eat a whole lot.

One highlight of the long weekend for me was when H answered my questions about her "favorites." This is the first time she's answered that kind of question and it was fascinating to hear. Here's what she said:

Favorite color: (looks down at her shirt) Pink
Favorite animal: horsies! (It's true, she's been very into them on her petting farm video)
Favorite number: 7 (possibly because of the They Might Be Giants song)
Favorite food: cereal (she'd just finished breakfast)
Favorite song: Dinosaurs (I assume this is Laurie Berkner's song, "We Are the Dinosaurs")

I'm excited to ask again because I'm fully expecting different answers next time. I'd love to hear what other toddlers have to say about their favorites.

Sometimes It Rains

We've entered the land of the tantrum and it is not pretty. H, age 2 years 3 months, has hit a milestone. Her level of understanding and ability to express herself in speech has soared -- and with that have come the tantrums. They are brief. They are loud. They involve the girl going boneless and sobbing on whatever floor is available be it our kitchen floor (not so bad), the sidewalk (kind of ick), or the subway floor (ew, ew, ew, ew, ew).

They seem to involve the commute to and from school, or at least that's when they are most difficult to experience. Last night on the way home, I got two. One in the Starbucks, where you just know the vibe the patrons are after has nothing to do with a screaming kid (and how many bad mom points do I earn from bribing my child to get in the stroller with vanilla milk? Sure, it's calcium rich, but it's laden with sugar) and one on the corner of the hill leading down to our apartment. She doesn't want to go down the hill. She does want to either cross the street in the wrong direction or go back to the bank because both of those sound really fun. Luckily, my husband happened by just as the empty stroller tipped over and spilled all the mittens, blanket, book, etc. onto the sidewalk.

I know this is just a part of growing up. I know this is part of testing limits and becoming her own person and getting comfortable with the fact that I'll take care of her even at her most rotten. And so far I don't even feel mortified. Sure, I don't meet peoples' eyes, but that's mostly because I'm trying to move us along without anyone getting hurt. It's just hard. It's another thing that's hard. And I signed up for the hard stuff. I absolutely want the total experience, but, yeah. Hard.

Oh, and our poor kitty cat had to have his toe amputated due to a cancerous growth. So he's hobbling around with a ridiculous-looking flashlight collar and various shaved spots and bandages.

And I had a wicked cold last week and have a bum lower back this week.

But, it is Friday. And Thanksgiving is somehow next week (how the heck did that happen?). And I'll just bet I get a huge hug and a major "MOMMY" when I pick H up in just a little while. We'll see how the rest of the trip home goes, but I know we'll get through it one way or another.

Irony

Irony is... ordering a new, lighter stroller this summer after lugging the old one up the subway steps one too many times only to discover the red, dry, skin on my palms is an allergic reaction to the handles. That doesn't seem fair. I just thought I needed a better lotion.

Today H was as cooperative and agreeable to the hour and a half wait for voting as a two year old could be, which was not enough for some people, but plenty cute and charming for most people -- and some people are just grumpy, what can you do? I probably shouldn't have scheduled the cat's minor surgery for the same morning as this monumental election, but then... vet at 7:30, voting at 8. I think I'm tired now.

Happy Halloween!

What fun! H is all dressed up in her comfortable lion costume. So far she prefers "I'm a lion" over "roar." On the train she turned to me and said, "I'm a lion and you're a giraffe." Sounds good to me! Upon entering her room this morning she rolled over and told me "it's the October month"!!! How the heck does she know this stuff? She also pointed to the 7 on our subway stop and said, "7 days in a week." Good grief. I can't keep up with this girl!

Last night we carved our pumpkin and roasted the seeds. It's the first time we've done that with her and we all really enjoyed it. That whole concept about how you get to enjoy special things again through your child's eyes is spot on. It made me excited for dying eggs in the spring -- and also made me want to mark ideas on next year's calendar like "go apple picking" "find a pumpkin patch" that, because we don't own a car and because we're not particularly adept at planning, we won't do if it's not marked down in advance.

So here are my Fall Resoulutions for 2009:

• Go apple picking
• Find a pumpkin patch
• Visit a petting farm/hay ride
• Jump in the leaves
• Drink apple cider

There have to be more great things I'm not thinking of -- what's on your list?

Five for Fall

Here are five fun mini-activities we've enjoyed recently:

1. PUMPKINS
H points out the pumpkins everywhere we go -- and there are a lot of them to see: in store windows, on stoops, a mini and a big one on our own table. We talk about the color and size. She gets so excited about them.

2. Walks in the Park
We are lucky enough to live near a major New York park. Often we point ourselves directly for the playground and see nothing else, but this weekend we veered off our usual path and romped through vibrant leaves and grassy slopes. The trees are magnificent and the magic of being in the middle of big New York parks is the city falls away and leaves you with that real feeling of quiet and nature that everyone needs a little of every now and again.

3. Cooking Cookies
H loves her own play kitchen and I've started having her help me cook by dumping in measured cups of flour or water (they don't always go directly in the bowl) and helping me stir. This weekend we made raisin and dried cranberry oatmeal cookies together. Yum! She ate a bunch of raisins as they baked and only had a bite or two once they cooled, but the experience of cooking together was great. She loves to smell the cinnamon and vanilla -- and there's something so fall, and so good, about these simple treats. 

4. Books Under the Blanket
My sister-in-law crocheted a snuggly purple and white afghan for us a few years back and it's perfect for a stack of books and cuddling while staying warm in the fall chill. Recently we've enjoyed the Elephant and Piggie series by Mo Willems.

5. Getting Ready for Halloween
H's first year, she was a baby skunk (she was two months old and slept right through the parade). Last year, she was a bumblebee, and this year she'll be a lion. There's a clown coming to her daycare (I'm hoping/assuming this will be fun, not terrifying) and we're planning to attend the parade again. We've observed all the Halloween decorations in our neighborhood (especially the pumpkin! See number 1). I think this is the first year she'll really get it. We've talked about what's going on, that Halloween is coming, that she'll dress up in a costume (and hopefully roar a lot). I think she's going to love it, but we'll have to wait and see.

I do love fall. Don't you?

Three Things for Friday

Hi All,

Happy Friday to you out there in blog-reading land. My brain is feeling scrambled so I'll offer my thoughts as a little list:

1. Tent in my living room
I have to give props to my husband for this one. We have this cute little tent that was supposed to be a perfect spot away from the sand at the beach. Well, guess what? It heats up like a little oven when it's sitting in the sun, so for two years it's lived under our bed. For who knows what reason, a few days ago my husband was inspired. He pulled it out from under the bed and set it up in the living room and H is having a great time with it. She reads in it, parks her doll stroller in there, zips down the zipper then crawls out the bottom flap -- it's super cool. Currently, I believe there's a pumpkin in there. See? It's even seasonally appropriate. 

2. Mommy versus Amy
H knows my name is "Amy" and she sometimes calls me by it, which is cute. I do prefer Mommy though and I actually have no problem being branded as "H's Mommy." I remember dropping H off at daycare a couple months ago and a little boy piped up: "H's Mommy's here!" My heart swelled with pride. "Yes!" I thought, "that's who I am." We're all different in this world of ours and I understand how some folks might feel their own sense of identity or self slips away a bit when they're known only as someone's mom, but... boy, it feels good to me. Maybe it's a part of still marveling after two plus years of it that I get to be a mom -- and to someone so lovely, fantastic, and fun. I do feel privileged to wear that badge. 

3. Didn't know that'd be hard
And from the "didn't know that'd be hard" column, which turns out to be surprisingly long: back before I was a mommy it never occurred to me how complicated it would be to decide what to do when your baby is sick. H woke up hot to the touch and low energy this morning (in our bed, but that's another story). At first we figured we'd send her to school. We've passed the point of totally freaking out every time she has a cough and now, I admit, we push the limit ever so slightly on what's acceptable for daycare attendance. She is getting molars and that can cause fever, but yeah, probably not the case here. I felt wiggly about it, but for one reason and another, it seemed the best and only choice. I actually left the apartment and walked down the block before realizing what needed to happen.

I came back and met hubby and H in the hallway, just leaving, and wound up taking her in a car service to my Dad, who is both retired and wonderful, and then hopped on a train to work. I was about two hours late, but I also did get work done today. Yeesh. She's had a good day (though she woke up with a fever after nap) with her Papa and we'll stay over tonight. This was definitely the right decision for this episode, but never did it occur to me that it would be complicated to figure out.

OK out there in blogosphere land,
Have a great weekend and may all your babies be healthy and happy,
Amy

A Little History

If you're especially astute, you may have noticed there's been a bit of a changing of the guards over here at the toddler mom blog. This blog used to be written by Maureen Ryan, who happens to be a first rate editor in addition to being a really fabulous mom. Maureen moved on to a new company and so I am lucky enough to take over her blog.

Maureen and I worked together for much of my four years here. We were also pregnant together. Her daughter was born two days before mine. Amazing. I can assure you we did not plan this. We shared an office upon returning from maternity leave -- and more than once we closed that office door and shared a few tears, too. It was such a gift to have someone right there who was going through the same challenges I was. Together we wondered if we were making the best choices for our babies, if we were doing our best at work, and talked through our difficulties and triumphs. We made different decisions about some things, but always found a way to respect each other's path. I think back to that time and I really don't know how I would have gotten through it without her.

And now things have changed, as they tend to do, and Maureen is a mom of two and I work on a different floor from the office we shared. We still get together, for play dates and birthdays. We email. And I think we'll always share that bond of figuring out how to be moms and professionals at the same time. Not that either of us would say we have it all figured out. Nope. I guess what I've figured is:

• You do the best you can.
• You reinvent the plan so many times you're really not sure it can even be called a plan anymore.
• You try to remember to give yourself a break because you really are hard on yourself.

Me and Maureen are both very lucky. We have beautiful, smart, healthy children and we get to work in a profession we feel strongly about and we both have supportive partners who make it possible to get through the day.

That's the story of where Maureen has gone and why I'm here now. What's your story? I'm all ears.

Orange Sippy Cup

Hi, my name is Amy and I'm a mom. Welcome to my little corner of the blogging world. I've worked at Scholastic for the past four years and my daughter turned two in August.

Here's what being a working mom means to me today:

• There's an orange sippy cup sitting on my desk (it's empty because I used the milk H didn't drink on the subway ride to daycare in my morning coffee -- who am I to waste organic 2%?)
• I'm missing half a day of work next week because the fabulous preschool in our neighborhood requires half an hour of supervised play as part of the application process. That half an hour begins at 11:45am, which causes me to wonder, if I were free at 11:45am on a weekday, why would I need preschool?
• And finally, I've got to get back to my to-do list because in approximately three hours I get the big hug and the delighted squeal of "Mommy!" and I'll probably get to play with play dough and stomp around like a dinosaur for a couple of hours. This makes everything worth it. 

That's my story. What's yours? I'd love to hear from you.